Sunday, February 18, 2018

All Marvel Cinematic Universe Titles, Ranked

Now that we're moving with headlong speed towards the end of Phase Three, and into the unknown maw that is Phase Four, I thought it might be interesting to rank all the various titles that make up the MCU. In this, I am not only including the films, but also the ABC and Netflix television shows (ranking each by season), as well as the long-lamented Marvel One-Shots. As of February 2018, that's 38 movies, one-shots, and television seasons in the can. Pretty damned impressive!

Here's the list, from least favorite to most favorite. I'll try to keep this listing updated as more MCU things are released.

Marvel's Inhumans (2017). Black Bolt and the Inhuman royal family is banished from the moon to Earth, while his brother Maximus takes the throne. I so wanted to like this. But the downgrading from feature film to low budget TV series really shows; bland sets, terrible CGI, and bad writing. They could probably redeem themselves with a higher-budget Season Two, but this was such a disaster that that ain't happening. My review.

The Incredible Hulk (2008). Bruce Banner evades the authorities while Emil Blonsky becomes the Abomination. Meh. I never cared enough about Banner to really get emotionally invested in the movie, and the action scenes were mediocre.

Item 47 (2012). A Marvel One-Shot included on the Blu-Ray release of The Avengers. A pair of small-time criminals gets hold of a discarded Chitauri weapon following the events of The Avengers. A neat idea, but I never got a feel for the two main characters.

Thor: The Dark World (2013). Thor must fight Malekith and the Dark Elves who want to bring darkness to the universe (literally). It fails largely because the villain's motives are so difficult to figure out, and he himself is largely wasted on the screen. My review.

The Consultant (2011). A Marvel One-Shot included on the Blu-Ray release of Thor. Agents Coulson and Sitwell sabotage an effort to get Emil Blonsky out of prison following the events of The Incredible Hulk. A clever idea, but since half of it was already seen as a mid-credits scene in Incredible Hulk, it felt unearned.

Agent Carter Season Two (2016). Now in California, Peggy and Jarvis unravel a mystery around "Zero Matter". I confess I found this season to be quite disjointed, and the central concept didn't seem fully fleshed out.

Iron Fist Season One (2017). Long thought dead, Danny Rand returns as a mystical warrior who must take on the figures controlling his father's corporation. Yes, it's true, Danny himself comes across as a whiny bitch, and there's way too much board room infighting and not enough mystical glowing hand fighting. But I think it set up some good things for later, especially showing dissension within the Hand.

Note: It's worth pointing out that after this point, everything is in the "good" category as far as I'm concerned. It's just a question of how good, in comparison to each other.

Doctor Strange (2016). Brilliant neurosurgeon Stephen Strange is injured in a car accident and learns how to use magic. I found this one lacking, unfortunately. Strange himself is great, but Kaecilius is the real weak spot. Why is he doing what he's doing? For that matter, what is he doing? Another weak MCU villain torpedoes the film, but Cumberbach's performance pulls it out of "bad" territory.

Daredevil Season Two (2016). Daredevil must fight the Hand with the help of his mysterious ex Electra. I have to say this got a bit tedious, as I want to see Matt and Foggy together, not at each other's throats. But the introduction of the Punisher and the unexpected return of the Kingpin make up for a lot of deficiencies.

The Punisher (2017). Ex-soldier Frank Castle uncovers a conspiracy that was involved in the death of his family. Went a little too long, and I was hoping for more Death Wish and less Three Days of the Condor, but overall a worthy effort. I think The Punisher works better as a supporting character than a lead, though, just by his nature.

A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to Thor's Hammer (2011). A Marvel One-Shot included on the Blu-Ray release of Captain America: The First Avenger. Agent Coulson stops a robbery at a convenience store while driving out to New Mexico for the events of Thor. Very clever, and fleshed out Coulson's character a lot.

Agent Carter (2013). A Marvel One-Shot included on the Blu-Ray release of Iron Man 3. Peggy Carter proves her mettle by taking a case on her own. Very well done.

The Defenders Season One (2017). Daredevil, Luke Cage, Iron Fist, and Jessica Jones band together to fight the Hand. Picking up on the factions-within-the-Hand thing introduced by Iron Fist was a good idea, and at least the motives of the bad guys were finally explained. Some of the interactions between the leads was just amazing, too.

Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. Season Three (2015-2016). Focused on the Inhumans and the secret history of Hydra, which has been trying to bring the powerful Inhuman Hive to Earth from an alien planet by using the obelisk. I have to say I found the episodes on the alien planet intensely boring, but the rest of the season was great.

Thor (2011). Thor is banished from Asgard to Earth, until he proves himself worthy of his hammer and defeats the usurper Loki. This is really great up until the Destroyer comes down to Earth. Since it's essentially an automaton, it doesn't really count as a villain, and I thought the menace was wasted. If Loki had sent a few frost giants instead, I think that would have been much better.

Iron Man 2 (2010). The son of Howard Stark's former partner uses the ARC Reactor technology to become Whiplash, using Tony Stark's bumbling rival, Justin Hammer, as cover. I really like this one, even though I know it's not very popular. I thought Whiplash was a great villain.

Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. Season One (2013-2014). Famously off to a slow start in the first half, but once the second half was able to pick up the Hydra storyline from the contemporaneous Captain America The Winter Soldier, things really took off.

Ant Man (2015). Scientist Hank Pym recruits burglar Scott Lang to stop his old colleague from rediscovering the secret of the Pym Particle, which can cause things to shrink and grow. Not quite a comedy, but close enough, using the heist film as a model was a great idea to change things up. My review.

Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. Season Four (2016-2017). Featured storylines relating to Ghost Rider, the Life Model Decoys, and a computer-generated world in which Hydra rules called the Framework. I didn't particularly care about Ghost Rider, but the LMD and Framework storylines were top-notch.

Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. Season Two (2014-2015). The now-fugitive agents of SHIELD fight Hydra's attempt to learn the secrets of an alien obelisk and a Kree city. I think this was the high-water-mark of the series so far. Really interesting plots, and very well done all around.

Luke Cage Season One (2016). Ex-con Luke Cage uses his impenetrable skin to clean up Harlem, including the criminal Cottonmouth. I loved most of this, but thought Cottonmouth was a pretty weak villain who only seemed to be a bad guy because he was a bad guy. I thought the city councilwoman Mariah Dillard was a much better villain, and hope to see more of her.

Iron Man 3 (2013). Suffering PTSD after the events of The Avengers, Tony Stark must fight the Mandarin who is waging a war of terror against the United States. I love the concept of AIM playing both sides off one another, and I thought the Mandarin twist near the end was great (I know I'm in the minority). My review.

Captain America: The First Avenger (2011). 90-pound weakling Steve Rogers is turned into supersoldier Captain America and fights the Red Skull and Hydra during World War 2.

Guardians of the Galaxy Volume 2 (2017). Star Lord meets his father, Ego the Living Planet who then must be stopped before he destroys all life in the galaxy. This is just marvelous, building on the relationships of the first film, and adding greatly to it.

Avengers: Age of Ultron (2015). Artificial Intelligence Ultron is out to destroy the Avengers and help evolution by wiping out humanity. I found Ultron to be a really great villain, and I hope they bring him back someday (just saying that he left one of his robot-selves behind at the Battle of Sokovia would be enough).

Agent Carter Season One (2015). Peggy Carter helps prove Howard Stark's innocence with the assistance of his butler, Jarvis. I really loved this one; 1946 New York was brilliantly brought to life, and the writing and acting were great.

Guardians of the Galaxy (2014). A bunch of misfits band together to keep Kree renegade Ronin the Accuser from getting an Infinity Stone to Thanos, the Mad Titan. The first true comedy entry in the MCU, it's the writing and the characters that make this shine. Ronin is so-so as a villain, but certainly better drawn than many. My review.

Daredevil Season One (2015). Blind lawyer Matt Murdock fights the villainous Wilson Fisk and ninjas. The writing here is some of the strongest in the MCU, and the choreography of the fight scenes is justly praised.

All Hail the King (2014). A Marvel One-Shot included on the Blu-Ray release of Thor: The Dark World. Trevor Slattery is interviewed in prison following the events of Iron Man 3. The best of the One-Shots, both hilarious and at the same time redeems the Mandarin as a real (non-Trevor Slattery) villain that could be brought into the MCU in the future, showing just how much world-building and MCU-expanding these one-shots can do. And the scene with Justin Hammer is just amazing.

Thor: Ragnarok (2017). Asgard is attacked, and Thor and Loki must team up to destroy Hela, but the eccentric Grand Master has other ideas. Bright, colorful, and funny; if this is any indication of the direction of the cosmic side of the MCU going forward, it's a good sign. My review.

Jessica Jones Season One (2015). Alcoholic superhero-turned-PI Jessica Jones fights Killgrave, a man who can control others' minds, including hers. This is a really great piece of work, and the psychological angle of Jessica's trauma from her time with Killgrave is really well-expressed. And he's just a great villain himself. And dead, of course. Because Marvel.

Captain America: Civil War (2016). The Avengers are torn apart by a government plan to require super-heroes to register themselves. The airport battle remains one of the standards by which other fight scenes are measured, and for good reason.

Black Panther (2018). The king of high-tech Wakanda must regain his throne from Killmonger, an exile who wants to wage war on the world. Really great world-building and visuals, and another strong villain. Ulysses Klaue as a supporting villain is just superb, too. My review.

Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017). High school nerd deals with his newfound superpowers, while being mentored by Tony Stark. Tom Holland is good, but it's Michael Keaton's Vulture who gets the most praise for his easy menace and clear motives. My review.

Iron Man (2008). The one that started it all. Kidnapped in Afghanistan, Tony Stark creates a prototype Iron Man suit from scraps. The montage where he's making the Mark II suit is one of my favorites in the whole MCU.

The Avengers (2012). Nick Fury of SHIELD brings together a team of superheroes to fight Loki and regain the powerful alien tesseract. The training scenes are great, and Red Skull stands out as one of the great villains of the MCU. Wish they'd stop killing them all the time... My review.

Captain America: The Winter Soldier (2014). Captain America must fight the super-assassin Winter Soldier, while uncovering a Hydra conspiracy inside SHIELD itself. Tense political thriller mixed with superhero adventure, plus the great reveal that threw the whole MCU on its side. Great stuff. My review.


Note: Not included yet are Agents of SHIELD Season 5 (2017-2018) because it hasn't finished its run yet, and Runaways Season 1 (2017-2018) which I haven't watched yet.